dennis

White privilege has reared its head once again.

America has officially become Love & Hip-Hop USA. As each day passes, we’re forced to be unwilling cast members of the White House Apprentice—and without any participation—we are becoming the ratchet reality show we don’t want anyone to know we watch in the comfort of our homes.

Every day via Twitter, the not yet impeached President and his crew of Republican bandits (and staff that I believe may be hostages) are making it harder to even utter the words, “I am American.” If he isn’t covering up extortion, blackmail, police corruption, reverse racism or porn stars—he’s getting into Twitter beefs or passing out pardons like bathroom hall passes.

What makes it even worse is that him, along with those who uplift his beliefs are getting elected in positions of actual influence.

Which leads me to Dennis Hof, a Nevada brothel owner and a pimp (yes you read that correctly, I said pimp). To date, Dennis owns at least seven different whore houses brothels across several Nevada counties. Though, If you’re still wondering who he is, let me catch you up. About three years ago, Dennis was thrusted into the spotlight thanks to Lamar Odom’s escape from the Kardashians $75,000 four-day stint that landed him in the hospital due to his overuse of drugs and Dennis’s house tenants.

But why am I writing about Pimp Dennis? Well it’s simple. Good ol’ Dennis has won the GOP Primary for state legislature—beating out a three-term lawmaker (who’s also a hospital executive)—and is the perfect example of how America is becoming the trick of the world and what white privilege is for those who may still be confused about what it is.

Thanks to the low political standards set by wypipo both near and far—Dennis has managed to take time out of his illustrious pimp career to give the great people of Nevada a chance to be the laughing stock of the US. Because we obliviously need more wypipo outside of Trump, Eric Grietens, Jeff Sessions, and Rudy Guiliani to embarrass us even further.

If you’re wondering what white privilege has to do with this—I think it’s safe to say that only in the United States of America can you have several known hoes, own a few hoe houses, be considered to run for public office, and win! But only if you’re white—because that isn’t going to fly if you are of the darker tone. Gone are the days where people hid their dirty secrets to get elected. Sex scandals or affiliation with that world of any kind are no longer something to hide in shame about.

To commemorate this moment and show that he was excited about his win and not mortified of his career choice—Dennis threw a party with his hoes and a well-known Madame by his side. On top of this newest accomplishment that may or may not make his grandchildren proud and not hide their faces—Dennis has also written,” The Art of the Pimp” to further the pimp education and keep the demand for pimps circulating.

But get this and this is where it gets funny. To add insult to the already injured GOP party, Dennis has cometh forward, crowning himself “The Trump of Pahrump” to yell from Mount Chalkasian that Trump inspired him to run. He even went as far as to tell the Associated Press that Trump (who should not be an inspiration to anyone) was like Christopher Columbus (who is also not an inspiration) to him.

“It’s all because Donald Trump was the Christopher Columbus for me,” Hof told The Associated Press in a phone call. “He found the way and I jumped on it.”

I will say though, if there was anybody to compare El Donny O to, it would certainly be the murderous thief who fake found this so called abandoned land and bullied his way through it for whatever country he was stealing it for. Though Dennis’s statement is nothing more than a hyperbole—there is a small portion of truth that lies within it since Trump is currently trying to bulldoze his way through and extricate the very people who helped build and sustain this country to fulfill his prophecy of Making America Great Again.

But let’s move on because of course none of that really matters to the explorers colonizers.

What matters is that Bishop Pimp Dennis will be on the ballot this November and the Republicans—who seem to draw the line at a pimp winning—are not happy about his win. As if anyone could possibly be any worse than the pussy grabbing President (who blackmails porn stars) we are stuck with until 2020.

Still, Dennis is not the first pimp to run for a political position in Nevada. Lance Gilman, owner, operator and I’m sure participator of the Mustang Ranch—ran for County Commissioner and won. If there was ever anyone to make sure the city’s funds are intact, it would be a pimp who has a lifetime of experience of taking his off the top.

But the plot thickens.

And this is where it gets interesting. To give his undivided attention to his new job, Dennis has stated he was selling off some of his brothels. I’m sure his win and newfound love for politics has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that the residents of Nevada have managed to get the closing down of brothels on the ballot this November.

Of course, the Hugh Hefner of Nevada cares about his state and the people in it and the fact that four of his 6+ brothels are going to be majorly affected if the vote passes have nothing to do with why his focus is shifting. Could it be he’s trying to show the great people of Nevada that he’s a stand-up guy by running for office and the fact that he’s run a successful whore business for the last decade and has nothing to do with him being able to serve the people’s needs and run his businesses.

Apparently, you don’t have to have any political experience in Nevada (or anywhere else in this country) these days. All you need to be able to do is persuade a group of semi-intelligent mayo sapiens that you want to make America great again and you’re on the ticket.

I guess come November, Nevada may have a pussy grabbing president and a pimp.

So I leave you with this—pimp on Dennis…pimp on.

 

Shadress Denise
Follow Me

Shadress Denise

Editor-in-Chief at DELUX Magazine
Editor-in-Chief @DELUX, author, foodie, and a culture junkie who just happens to be the blackest person you will ever meet.
Shadress Denise
Follow Me